Durian Icecream

Ice cream making, making ice cream.

Failed to turn ice into ice cream.

And it end up becoming yogurt.

today, i ask my dad to buy me durian,

been thinking of making ice cream since like ages.

and finally, i make one

though it failed ( i guess because of the ice)

but the food testers (my mum and my aunt), give a thumb up for me

yay ! im going to try out second time.

Ingredient:

Durian

Ice

Milk powder

CoffeeMate

Milk

Process:
Blend it all !

i estimated the quantity of those ingredient i used, therefore no amount can be shared here, sorry

is been awhile i never update my photo to the blog

the hair is kinda messy, my mind is in the state of cut or not to cut hair mind-war

perm or not to perm hair?

dye or not to dye hair?

holiday is day for me to keep thinking way to spend money..

finding reason for me to keep my mind away from buying another camera..
and therefore, this pop out:

it doesn't matter what kind of camera you using

the only matter is the person who using the camera. ;)

true, very true
a few friend of mine whom snap photo with compact camera wins those who snap with dslr
even their photo editing skills are more detailed than those who own dslr.
bleh~ i still want a dslr, as accessories
future baby future ~

when i say i want to go, they don't let me to go

when i say i don't want to go, they keep tempting me to go.

so should i go or not to go?

今天的夜晚很暗

星星和月亮都被乌云挡了

萤火虫飞过几只，

还以为是流星。

流星一粒都看不到，

可能我已不再很用心的等待了吧。

每晚特地的等你上线，

你上线了，

又在等你找我聊天，

可是，

你都不来找我，

或许

你忙了吧~

我好可悲啊，

却无法鼓起勇气

先对你说声

“你最近好吗？”

“你最近快乐吗？”

最后还是白等了，

就像，

今晚傻傻的白等了流星得出现

（或许太早了吧）

爸爸最近很忙

为了减少爸妈负担

牺牲了旅行

一个人放假

原来可以这么的无聊

一直看着别人的背影

原来

可以感受到如此的寂寞

i knew the hate of you for me to stepping into your life

i'm sorry

and

that's the reason

i'll never

never

ever

had any confident

in talking to anyone

it seems like,

knowing me is a mistake

and slowly

it turn to a fault.

tired to tried to please everyone,

i shall be more selfish now.
tired of guessing whether my words hurt anyone,
i shall be more quiet now.
tired of guessing whether my action offence anyone,
i shall less meeting with all of you now.

i shall said thank you, 

to those whom i thought as friends

for making me realize

not to put anymore

trust

hope

into all of you anymore.

they said,
loner should just continue becoming loner
they'll never understand meaning of friend
as they don't have anyone welcoming them as friend.

felt neglected again,

maybe from the very beginning

i wasn't really suit to be

among the crowd

among them.

maybe,

i am the loner.

friends that used to be so closed,

felt so far away.

friends that used to listen,

close themselves away from me.

maybe,

i am the loner.

to forget the stuff keep twister-ing my mind

i developed hobbies.

:)

i realize soon enough that 

i suit to be loner

pretty flower pretty :)

selling sunflower to earn extra saving to the concert :3

tried to challenge planting other flowers

and i hope

they will grow :)

well,

at least i still have him :)

给他/她，

其实我有也会怕

别把我看得太勇敢

很多时候你也真的很过分一下

in love with waiting

enjoyed the silence

Paper Fish 1

blur fish,

swim blindly, moving forward..
facing different obstacle to reach the top.

break through all the task,

to move forward..

few more to go..

Don't collapse

Food Delicacies at Bukit Mertajam

#1 The Duck Egg Char Kuey Tiow

RM4 per plate + drink

love it! but too little

#2 Chicken and Pork Rice with Laksa soup

i love the taste of the laksa

it remind me of my night school fish ball laksa :)

#3 Ho Soon Tomyam Thai Seafood

even the sambal belacan taste so nice

for those who love spicy food should try this

A short and unplanned trip

having fun eating and walking :)

haircut

got myself a hair cut, after one year

even if i dislike it,

i still have to bear it for few month..

the hair,

is back to messy again

and i don't know why.

people around me said, i look younger

previous hair is too mature..

with this hair,

i can act cute

:3

the hair suppose in red color
but
end up black...
sigh

nobody notice i change new spec too
:)
well
that's all




thanks for reading

忙

Ever since i hook up with Mr.Busy

Grandpa Stress keep pressured me for abandon Madam Assignment and Mr. Test

and now, i shall make them happy again with the help from Mr.Study

anyway quick summary,

the final year, i should try enjoying..

this semesters events successfully ended

from PC Fair, Annual Dinner to Flea Market

(finally i can enjoy a good evening nap, but end up feeling sick =.=)

though less contribution had been done by me, i gained a lots!

Retiring from society this semester, 

and yet my shoulder still felt heavy and pain..

lots of finalization need to be done before passing down..

i shall not date with Mr.Procrastinate anymore..

good luck everyone :)

6290

Officially getting older now
thanks to all the people who wished me
apologize to friends who trying to called me but i didn't answer..


i never really like celebration.
especially celebration which focuses on me.
this year different,
some expected surprises
and some not.


special thanks to organizer
the one who run every shop for cake
thank you very much!
friend told me the whole story.
^^


thanks to my best friend and her boyfriend, came from far to give me extra surprises


Thanks to my gang, for four years, never really give up to celebrate birthday with me!


thank you for all the presents and surprises and the warm wishes

Thank You

ShyuanTY, ChingTY, YoongLS

CM Lee, Wallace Tan, Sue, Eanling, William, ShawPing, KinHow

Terence, Chong Jz, JienBoon, Leo,

KeatWei, Roti and Roti's gf,

SinKeat, PuiSan, WaiLap, JunWei, JienWei, Janardana

LiJiun, FoongLin

YiXin

thank you for everything, even thinking of what had happen making my eyes teary.. T.T

When you said, the last birthday we can celebrate together.. making my heartache

When you sang the birthday song, making my heart touched

im too happy till unable to response toward everything

Resolution:

1. Control my temper
2. Success Graduate
3. Be more pretty :D

 


lastly, a song for you ^^

An Experience with Nikon P300

After years with films.

Finally, i got myself a digital camera.

In doubt of buying one, in term of functionality and bad experience i had few year back using my friend's digital camera.

Surprisingly, I am impressed with Nikon P300

btw, i still love films

A several photo snap using Close-Up

Easy Panorama 180 degree

Easy Panorama is super user-friendly,
basically you just have to move the camera to the right or left, and the camera will capture and stitch those images to became like the above pictures.
It also came with Easy Panorama 360 degree, but i failed to create those pictures.
Will learn more about this in future.

Night landscape

I love camera which can capture image faster as I like to move around,
night landscape normally required user to hold their camera for at least 3 second, so that more light can be absorbed.
this camera, required less than a second.
Maybe the environment is a bit brighter..
but the outcome of the image did impress me

the moon, i hold the camera for a couple of seconds and this is the outcome

oh, night landscape came with two function, handheld or tripod.

if you are using tripod, shutter speed is longer compare to handheld.

Zoom

4.2X Zoom

Some random photo i took using Auto Mode

Manual 

This camera is totally good for those who want to learn more about photography
It allow user to manually set the aperture and shutter speed of the camera.
you may found the picture above is stupid, but i found it hard to capture glow in dark item with a distance of at least 1.5meter.
but i apologize for the shacky image. I'm not a pro-photographer after all. :P


This is just some of the function this camera can do and there is lot more to explore.

It is light, comfortable hand-grip
and those square box design, was totally my style..
Oh, one more thing that i like, is the flash is hidden means no more auto-flash
but sadly, the red-eye does killed your eyes at the night time.
Overall, Nikon P300 did impressed me and i started to change my bad perspective toward compact camera.
For those who want to learn more about photography and think that DSLR is expensive,
you should go for a compact camera.
Invest lesser and still can learn more :D

i can imagine the peaceful face of your's sleeping while deep inside you are struggling to be alive
why god take away people who choose to live and not those who choose to left?


life short,
i should train my courage..
a courage to say hi to you
before i regretted it

you will always be remember by every single one you knew
for the pure heart of treating everyone as your own family.
you were there to listen,
you never selfish,
you love all of them

thank you for coming to my life..
thank you for becoming my friend despite of how bad i am...
thank you for sharing your love to me..
thank you for accompany me to the wedding..
thank you..

May you rest in peace and happy

messy hair = sexier

don't you agree?

that's why my hair is always messy

random picture

my face and hair make me felt prettier today

after editing the color tone..

my waterish eye's

haha

*self-adore-ing*

After intern, im going to focusing on generating more traffic to my blog
im going to renovate my blog using skills i learned
change everything even the content to more informative
informative = less emo post
checklist:

• renovate blog
• write something informative
• write more informative post
• more
• MORE!

i just want to earn more extra pocket money
my blog did not fulfill the nuffnang requirement
*no wonder the money never increase*

my house is badly damage by termite
damn!
after intern, going to be hell busy week helping renovate the house
two weeks of semester break..
i wonder how many things im able to complete

为这而留着的原因

还需要多点时间

another platform

this might be the end

but not the death of it

goodbye

The story:

Mr.Motivation started approaches me not long ago..

But,sadly,

They killed him right in front of me

My bestfriends, Ms.Confident and Mr.Courage

couldn't accept the fact that Mr.Motivation is dead and ran away from me..

leaving me alone to gone through

the pathetic silent dark week..

sigh..

Since then,

Every night, i cry and mourn.

Everyday i hope and pray,

That Madam Miracle would appear and bring them back to me again..

i couldn't accept the fact that they are gone now

i am alone now

and disturbed by Mr.Alone who is trying to seduce me migrating to the Emo country,

every single night!

the story continue~~

I tried not to go into the social world so much

afraid that i get even sad when i saw how happy others are..

lot of things twisting in my mind lately

and i don't even know what i am burdened with

what my mind is troubling my emotional with

maybe staying alone, facing the walls every night

talking only to myself

is driving me sadly

我很丑 所以我很想变美

我很羡慕你的美

我很笨 所以我很想变聪明

我很羡慕你的聪明

我很穷 所以我很想变有钱

我很羡慕你那么有钱

我什么都没有 所以我很想拥有一切

我很羡慕你能拥有一切

我好可悲

好像没权利去要求

也没权利去争取

肯定失败

发现自信非常恨我

离我很远很远

keep on changing till i did not recognize myself anymore

原来 已经那么多年了

累了 淡了

所以 再也不期望

鼓起勇气的能力都没了

原来我 一个人

唱不出一首歌

会很想哭

my long hair

before i start

wanna promote this little stuff i bought using the book voucher

wuhoooo~

the only thing im satisfy bought with no regret

i remember i got lot of book i wanna buy

but when i go there with the free voucher

i stunt

and

i hard to make any decision to purchase any other books

i finish spending it with buying a lot of unnecessary stuff

urgh~

kinda sad..

should give more!

but still i love you for giving us spending money ^^

thank you

i never cut my hair since like 3 months

erm 4? 5?

im not sure but the conclusion is my hair is grewing more and more kanasai

how should i describe it?

picture below!

hell yeah!

hectic

where should i put my long fringe

left?

right?

divide middle?

all behind?

i maybe look sleepy all the time with my sleepy eyes,

but the hair make me look like i just woke up.

and if you notice,

my pathetic spec which follow me for two years

look kanasai also

please don't notice that i'm getting fat

yea yea yea...

i knew im getting fat!

my phone's camera is not functioning after drop from high place twice

at the same place

same day

continuously~

uh huhuhuu

im deeply broke

i want many thing

i need nothing

therefore

im suffering of wanting it

need = buy

want = dream it

:(

im starting to crap out of nowhere

better off now

人不美 就不红

知识底 讲的话 都没人听

到底该怎么做

才能鼓起勇气

寻找我要的快乐 和 幸福

我到底做对了吗？

做了那么久，

都不懂 自己在努力着什么

都不懂 到底有没有得到 或 学到了什么

我还是很怀疑

自己的能力

到底

可以做些什么

我到底 有些什么？

for the past few month,

i keep updating all those feeling within my mind

have not been updating those song i've been listening

er.. cut short the story,

let all the youtube link below talk (with some 'short' caption of mine :P)

#1 T-ara -Lovey Dovey

i never paying much attention to t-ara

just knew some two famous song of them BoBeep and YaYaYa

when this song came out after roly poly,

i not really like it.. :P

but after repeating it zillion time

it's addictive.. (for me la)

you should check out their comeback show,

watching them shuffling..

is a great song

#2 Jay Park - Know Your Name

i always like his song

been supporting his style ever since his sole debut

#3 B1A4 - Chu Chu Chu

#4 五月天 - 星空

super love them!

especially this song

and super love the meaning behind it

#5 伍家輝 - 你愛我嗎

we should pay more attention to malaysian artist

this is one of the artist i like

me like his voice

do you love me? :)

#6 柯震東 ft 陳妍希 - 漂流瓶

since i have no internet connection

i miss out a lot of great new songs

been wanted to listen and watching their mv so so much

i have a great and long list

but to cut it short

the top 5 wanted list:

1. Miryo (B.E.G) making her own solo debut
2. K.Will
3. Jay Park
4. B.A.P ( new group that was like making lot of attention)
5. FT Island

argh.. BigBang gonna release new album, i will miss it!

and EXO that keep releasing teaser, wonder when will they really coming up with a real album

i want to watch GLEE

i want to watch OnePiece

i miss internet so much

and if you wondering why i can still blog

thanks to YES broadband

and Maxis broadband i use awhile when im in my aunt's house

sobs..

well life continue even without internet,

thanks to radio entertaining my days

been addicted to the DJ's voices ^^

byebye

me feel happy today

happy saturday

went for a short date with my friends

watch a nice movie

ate a good late dinner

everything is super fine

even the weather

just that,

im feeling tired the whole night

must be awake for such a long time...

is quite late

but im still protesting against the sleepy mode

hmmm

i miss it,

the night life i use to enjoy :)

is hard to struggle against the night alone

i feel blessed and appreciated,

even just for a day

friends willing to spend their time with me ^^

even if they willing to spend an hour or more,

to chat with me when i online

it feel great to have friends by side

ya

is a great week

i should declare peace with my bed and pillows

good night

a reason is needed

to motivate someone

to do something

there is no right or wrong in this world

people defined it right, when there is a lot of people protesting that it is even it isn't

majority always win

most of the time,

i choose to be with the minority

though they are wrong in the perspective of others

but if,

if you take a minute

and stand on their shoes

and act on behalf on them..

what will you do?

everyone make stupid mistake once awhile

but wait,

stupid mistake?

how do we defined it as stupid mistake?

just because i the only one think that it is a mistake and a stupid mistake

so everyone must be on my side and think that it is a stupid mistake

ya,

i have been very bad in judging people lately

due to all those stupid thought i made...

on how i defined right and wrong

on how other's people accept my definition

well,

im not trying to said that i am a super good person

in most of the stories happen among friends,

im just a neutral outsider..

analyzing it alone...

:P

angry, disappointed or upset we must!

but shall all of us,

look back sometime

far more behind before all those stories happen

what make us till today before this

worth or not worth it,

is you, your own to judge it..

admitting mistake and saying sorry

accepting mistake and apologize

:)

i hope one day

u will realize

the importance of things you owned in the past

one sad thing i discover is

no one to share and talk about it together

sigh

i guess,

it might be funner if there is someone working together with me

im jealous

jealousy make me keep envy and talk how good other's ppl life is

how about me?

:(

i paint the night in silent

once

i paint myself black tonight

:(

说自己不懂的和别人沟通

要不如说，没人懂得我的话题

没人想听

没人想知

不是自己心事重重

很多事不说出来

因为觉得你不会懂

也尝试过说出来，

看到别人冷淡的回应，

最后，

漫漫的

自己变成什么都不说了。

以前，

会很讨厌这世界，

不给我一个他

可以明白

我所看见

我想象的世界

我说的故事

明白我的安静世界

笑笑我的欢乐世界

现在

不在讨厌这世界了

不知不觉

我漫漫的变得很自私

想要

一个人

享受

在

自己觉得的美

如果你说，你了解我

当我自己也不了解我自己

不知道，

自己喜欢的和讨厌的是什么

你到底，知道我些什么？

你的好，全部人知

我的好，到底有人知吗？

还是，我根本就够不好

我不了解自己

我无法把自己去解释自己到底是怎样的一个人

只知道，我很确定

没有任何人，喜欢或自持我的喜欢

很喜欢把我的喜欢当成笑话，

直到，有一天

你喜欢上我的喜欢

而我，只能像个傻瓜

在后面支持你的喜欢...

在了解自己的过程中，

反而

更加了解身边人的一切。

是我太骄傲了吗？

还是，说到最后

我根本就是不会沟通的人？

我也不知道...

是我把自己关注太久了吗？

很多小时候的事

想不起来了

记忆力变得很差很差，

听觉变得很差很差，

味觉变得很差很差。

我会怕

在听不见你的声音，

在看不见你的存在，

会忘了 这一切的感觉

会忘了 你 他 她 和 它

最害怕

你 会 忘 了 我

自己要求很多事

就算有办法去实现。

到最后，还是被拒

漫漫的也变成 不敢去实现自己要求的一切

被拒绝很多次

不代表，再次被拒绝 不会感到痛

每次

都把世界看成很多不一样的镜片

要看到 不一样的世界

看不明白 我写了这么长的文章？

我自己 也看不明，

因为

我写不出

我心

我脑

还有我

想告诉你的事

最后

我

还是

选择

安静

不再

讨厌

世界

不给

明白

我的

一切

the first roundabout in my life

very creepy even to think of it

even creepier when im on it

huge relieve after i get trough it

phew~

car in big city indeed moving very fast and close

is a good good day

and good night ^^

to success or not

is still a question

开工大吉

还真的很吉

老板给了一封很大的红包

三数目！还比我想象的三数目还要大！

真的很好意头的数目 ^^

老板开始给我做一些比较有关于公司的小小的大事

又在开始慢慢的学习中

一切都很顺利…

谢谢老板对我的好

也要谢谢同事姐姐对我的好

还真的遇到很多贵人帮助 :)

不知不觉，

四个星期已过了

我也开始慢慢的适应一切的不习惯

漫漫的接受，

漫漫的喜欢，

这里的一切…

每早，

漫漫的走去公司，

享受着早上的美…

喝着热热的 teh tarik

观察人们忙碌生活…

有时，不知不觉的笑了

可能已不再担心一切的担心

努力的不去想一切不可能发生的悲哀

努力的去做好今天

就这样的

笑了 :)

买了个手表

超级的爱它

有一种久久的感觉

找他找了很久很久~

有三年没戴手表了

最近

好吃好住

我胖了

真的要开始吃少一点点

i remember when i was a teenagers, my peers use to laugh at my short fingernail

which looks like mangkuk or bowl..

while theirs looks like wine glass...

now when i grew up

i grew it long long like vampire's nail

and now, i can have wine glass nail

and bowl nail, which you can't have it :P

when i cut my hair short,

i look fugly~

nobody wants to be friend with me

confident low low

and it teach me lot's of stuff during that period

now the hair is longer now

and im happy happy

the confident up up a bit bit

is been awhile i never self snap my own picture,

and it feels weird posting own picture at facebook...

argh!

bossie say i work for the same thing over a week

and in the end cant provide any solution/recommendation/documentation or result

Orz

i felt bad but in the progress of learning..

at least, i understand a bit bit more than last time(i guess? Orz)

lots of time i was thinking,

if they were here, things will be easier..

they can help me solve it while i can sit back and order order

LOL maybe due to this,

i had a super hard time learning now...

working make me miss studying so so much :(

i miss all my friends so much :(

i want to meet with them and share with them all my problem!

i wanna tell them i learn lot!

i want to share with them

laugh with them

bully them

bluff till morning with them

working on school event together with them...

go to school with them..

i miss going to school,

i miss sleeping at lecture hall..

i miss stalking everyone in school...

i miss skipping class to have lazy afternoon nap...

i miss napping T^T

i miss nasi lemak..

i miss the rainny night market..

and i miss kampar!

i felt relieve with the choices i make now

those doubt that affected me earlier is slowly disappearing,

things that i think is good from the start end up not really good

but things that i think is bad from the start turn up to be something i like and been keep pushing me forward till now ^^

i feel blessed (but i still want to complained! :P)

direction to move up more stage is still blur,

but

i saw chances in front of me,

chances tell me that those are opportunity

opportunity told me lots of effort needed in order to climb to them

im climbing..

im climbing slowly slowly and hopefully the opportunity is still there and open more chances for me!

from those chances, i hope can find my direction toward the light!

each path will lead to success,

even if you failed, you still gain something in the process...

so i'm trying to move on...

digging treasure..

wanna write how how hard i feel during this first week

so that, i can compare it again after i finish my internship

so here it goes

on 1/1/2012, i landed ( or should i say i stepped?)

in a city

a city which is different from my hometown

big? crowded? full with car? the road is big and twisting from one end to another end?

anyway, i will caught into Ipoh for few month to undergoes my internship

i should have feel blessed

i have relative that stay nearby, who will come to me if i'm in any trouble..

i have boss and colleague that never look down on me as i'm not clever or good in stuff that they good with, they willing to spend time to teach me..

sometime i feel ashamed of myself for not learning all those basic/fundamental of everything better at school

in a week, i realize how tiny i am,

how weak i am

how stupid i am =.=

yeah.. i regretting now for not studying all those thing in school good

and my boss need to re-teach me again..

it hurt my pride, but nvm

it hurt now better than in future...

the first week of my internship,

it felt as if i am really working,

stepping myself into the society....

it felt good when i'm in the office

but it isn't when i'm not in the office....

i am totally alone!

yeah, i'm living with a renter

a renter that shut herself in the room,

we only communicate in the morning as she is very good to fetch me to her workplace which is much more nearer for me to walk to the office compare from the house.

but then, she is weird..

maybe my aunt keep influence me saying this lady is weird which somehow manipulate me and making me thought she is weird..

maybe because she is a professor in medic college, which making me fear of her as she is quite strict and will scold people..

she is a lady which is very different from the aunty i meet back then in the hometown..

but other than that, she is good..

maybe is my problem..

when im back to the home

the only thing i can do is sleep

or watch drama..

it felt as if my life is completely empty

i feel lonely,

i think a lot of stupid thing

will i really be alone for the rest of my life when i grew up in future...

this feeling is kinda sad...

the first two night i'm here really making me wanna cry out...

friends all have their own difficulties to encounter everyday,

i should not have burden them with my problem..

it is not their problem..

yeah.. this is the problem i wanna solve

i wanna fix from myself

i want to learn to be independent..

the process is hard T^T

is hard to live without friend but i have to try hard hard to live alone...

what kind of theory is it? =.=

well nvm,

i guess those emo emo feeling will just pop out from no where since im living alone...

i will type lots of sad and unimportant essay and post regularly in here.. =.=

and then, i guess i will have communication problem,

since i'm here,

i rarely laugh

i rarely talk what i want to talk for more than 50sentences or maybe lesser than 25 =.=

sooner i will become loner and forget how to talk..

Orz

i am such a loser~

i never tell anyone especially my parents this

when they ask, i will tell them i am completely fine,

friends are treating me very good~

don't worry about me,

i am okay

i am fine

sigh

in fact

i am worry about myself

i am not okay and i don't know what i'm not okay with and what i not okay with is okay or not

i don't know

but i just don't want them to worry about me..

Orz

i complained a lot.. =.=

am i doing the right thing?

what i'm doing now is it the best choice i can choose now?

sigh

this question had been bothering me

am i making the right decision of choosing the path for becoming what am i today?

all those question that i keep questioning myself is it indicate that i am regretting now?

my biggest problem..

i don't know how to communicate with people regarding my problems

the truth is

i'm scare

i'm sad

lots of thing keep twisting in my brain and i feel sick of it

i feel like crying now T^T

what can i do?

what should i do?