=(

i suppose to post a shout out bout this at twitter or facebook..

but i felt myself so sarcastic if i do so..

but i just couldn't help myself from not thinking bout it..

is it i too sensitive??

I'm happy to heard something from you,

but when i saw something different from what you told me,

it turn up to be something very very disappointing to me..

I'm not expecting anything from you..

that is your life,

you do it the way you want..

i just don't understand why you wanna 'lie' to me..

lot of sad thing happen this week...

i make my phone look so pariah in just a second..

i give my brother put a very big airplane on something that I've exciting waiting for..

give some of my tutor a big freak out that i will have a high possibility failing a subject..

the emotion of me just go down and down and down...

i wanna forget everything by talking and talking and just talking and crapping..

and suddenly all those feeling of wanna hide in a dark corner to cry pop out when i realize you are not-even-trying to ignore me.. T___T

am i that bad?

why..

it is been so many year..

and i can swear to god,

though my mind is evil,

but i never done anything wrong to you...

why would you done that???????????!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'm feeling left-out...

if later my aunt dump me again..

i think as if I'm be forgotten...

T_T

please let it end by this month..

please~

=(

I x CNY

I used to Love CNY a lot.. A LOTSSSsssssss

will countdown till the arrival of it...

but now i kinda hate for it..

is seems to be some sort of pressure to me...

i don't know why..

i just hope that this day came and pass quickly...

maybe because this day will be celebrated not during my semester break..

kind of jealous to see others who got a longer break than me..

maybe i hate to just celebrate for less than a week then go back to study again..

~.~

is more to we are bind to CNY pressure to go home more than go to school pressure..

maybe is just me... xP

but whatever is it..

I still love CNY~

especially the shopping part xD

bought some clothes and pants..

just don't know whether have any chances to wear it frequently xD

one year wear one time.. LoL

I wanna play with fire cracker..

not that type of BOOM BOOM...

I wanna see beautiful firework in the air^^

I wanna meet up with all my long time no keep in touch friends..

I wanna SS with all of you~~

I wanna go for a movie with all of you~~

I wanna crap non-stop with all off you~~

I wanna get updates from all of you~~

and of course my cousiee who all been away for such a long time...

and playing some card games and drinking session~ hopefully will be ON!!

note some changes in me xD

i grew into more quiet person...

and of course,

I'm the most disappointing friend you ever get who won't be the 1st one to say hello and ask how are you

xD

but I'm gonna change it all..

keep me some times..

till now,

i still can't adapt to it...

well, you will know when we meet up^^

new year~

hopefully it will change it all..

bring only luck and less challenges in life..

simple simple normal normal life..

^^

something happen recently..

and i feel the shame on me..

=(

I'm sorry...

Addictive

I'm trying to control it..

therefor i like everything and everyone of it..

i even changes those i like once awhile..

damn..

it is so addictive..

i felt myself turning to die hard fans as day pass..

im watching the same mv of them over and over again..

wanna get update bout them every single minute..

this is serious..

==

i never felt myself that stupid before and now i am..

doing all those stupid stuff...

happy, sad, excited and disappointed at the same time..

sigh~

control!!

CONTROL IT!!!!!!

but i wanna be your +

i want you to be my +

xD

im crazy... =.=

nightmare

keep having nightmare everyday..

even nap awhile also had a bad dream..

some i forgotten..

i just remember i woke up in shock or struggle a lot till i wake up..

the one i remember is my tooth drop one by one..

TT

so horrible terrifying..

it felt so real...

when i woke up i really thought my teeth all gone...

other is keep chasing by a monster and i don't remember what it looks like..

sigh~

izzit too many bad stuff happen causing me to non-stop thinking and reflect it in my dream =(

even now lappy keyboard is playing with me..

previously is the Z key

now is the Shift key

wuargggghhhh!!!

please make it a doom month rather than doom year T_T

by the way,

I watched Predator 2010 and 童眼

both movie are good..

so damn gan jiong!!

i was terrified by some of the scenes =..=

i can saw myself jump off from the monitor reflection..

Predator 2010 really good, because you will keep wanna know what happen next..

same goes to 童眼

but i wanted to just skip to the end rather than wait every scenes..

ghost movie sometime quite boring because most of the scenes have long pause break.. xD

that's all~

gonna take some rest..

hope for a better dream n better day tomorrow ^^

i cant be positive as they is..

this year totally a bad damn doom year..

i hate it..

every week sure got things happen..

though it did not happen to me..

but i feel sad for them..

can't i just pass all the luck i have to them TT

there is always output which did not benefit us..

and bloody stuff happen every week..

1st is the chest bone crash..

next is the finger crash..

then is the shoulder crash..

now is the leg crash some more causing a loss of transportation..

dear GOD..

please stop it..

the challenges is too challenging..

they just started something..

please give us some hope so that we still have strength to continue..

especially them..

please show us an guide for everything..

bless those workers who injured..

if that bird house is causing us the bad things.

i will definitely crash it down and burn it!!

Update

my body feel so old..

now the whole shoulder in pain..

especially the neck..

the previous plastic making need to stand whole day making my leg n waist in pain..

*waist pain because need to turn to other table fast*

now in charge of packaging plastic making my neck in aches..

my shoulder and thumb in pain because need to take lots of plastic in a time and many times..

just now go mirror myself!

OMO~ i got dark circle dy..

==

this is some story of my job~~

boring~

but tomorrow will be the last day~

next sem break go help again...

^^

result release yesterday..

i do hope a lot for this semester..

well, every semester i also hope to see at least an apple..

but disappointed =(

next semester try to obtain one..

well, last minute study did not disappoint me..

i get what i deserve..

maybe i should start study everyday next semester to boost my cgpa?

lalalala~

lots of my friends did not achieve a very good result..

haih..

is not your fault..

is the school!

the school purposely failed us..

so we can repeat

and pay them money!

school now needs lot of money to build new building.. ~.~

let us together try harder and harder next semester!!!

p/s: i dint expect anyone to failed that subject =(

i thought i done the best to help but in fact I'm not..

working2

thought of something to add on bout what i hate bout working..

ngek!

waking up!!!

is the hardest thing..

TT

especially now..

have to wake up at 6.30am everyday..

(yawn)

back to home already 6pm..

online awhile already 8pm..

bath and online awhile is already 12am..

--

still haven't talk to any worker at there informally except asking for simple help ad smiling to each other..

even asking help i will ask my dad to call them to help me =.=

I'm looks and sound cocky hor..

im getting little expert in making plastic bag..

gosh..

i had polluted the earth by creating around 1M plastic bags this few days..xD

sorry earth..

though i love you very much

but i have to ask everyone to say 'YES' to plastic bag

recently im obsessed with making origami

and stuff that needed to DIY...

im trying to make use of everything around me..

maybe will buy a fabric and make myself a pencil case and purse since is hard for me to buy one that suit my taste~~

lalala~

xD

trying to workout more in this field..

^^

Working

Working? No problem..

working can be fun..

u get to knew lots of friend,

u get to knew bout some skills..

what i hate bout working is....

the 1st day of working..

well, the day before working is full of excitement where your curiosity level of everything bout tomorrow is the max level,

making you insomnia? but i dint reach that part..

the 1st day of working is really ngong ngong/ dumb dumb

yes.. very dumb.. waiting for order but still shy to ask bout it..

looking around with the dumb face of the new environment..

some may act as if they knew everything from previous experience..

because you are new, people will tend to give you the easiest job and you hate it..

it is predictable for every 1st job?

what is this? 3 seconds for guessing

3...

2...

1..

ding dong~

times up..

cleaning up, sweeping, empty the dustbin

and worst of all if doesn't have any cleaner..

clean up the toilet.. ==

hahahaa!!

boss will ask you look around and get to know bout the environment..

try to make friends but everyone look serious with their work while you look like a dummy looking at them trying to say a 'HELLO'?

shy people like me usually get to know a colleague at least one week..

even talk to them asking for help also very hard.. (pai seh nia)

therefore 1st day of working for me is hard...

the second thing i hate bout working is dealing with broken machine..

I'm a dumb dumb..

i know nothing except knock knock, kick kick until it function

xD

hire a technician!

i don't want touch machinery stuff.. the broken one lar...

third thing i hate is...

i cant think of it.. haha..

standing for 8 hours i still can..

no air-cond also can just don't give me work under the sun

continue next time when i free...

blog bout this because recently helping out my father with his work..

just two day of working and i injured my waist..

not very pain but still pain==

sound so old huh.. ==''

i need yoko-yoko..